Holding to Promise….

“If you go in I promise to take all the pain away”….

The husband made a promise to one of the feral cats (Manson) last week because he was badly injured.  We waited, we set a trap and hoped that he would go in.  He didn’t.  Everyday we would look for him to see if he had passed.  Everyday he surprised us and we had no idea what kept him going.  I think he wanted the younger cats to mix with the small colony in the back 40.  All this week I watched the younger ones spend more time back there with the elders (the back 40 cats are much older).  The younger ones have been having a difficult time, lost if you will, since Manson became injured.  This dude was like the pied piper, the young cats would just follow him everywhere.

This morning he sat by the feeder not moving I couldn’t even tell if he was breathing or not.  The husband said he was still with us but most likely not for very much longer.   The husband decided to see if Manson would let him pick him up and put him in a box.  He did.   This is one of many reasons I love this man.  The husband kept his promise to this cat and took him to the vet who does all our TNR.  Manson will be returned to us for this will be his final resting place.  He was born here and this is where he shall remain with the rest of his family.

RIP buddy, he kept his promise.

CHANGES….

It’s a Jazzy kinda day…

There is something about listening to jazz music and cooking.  The smell of onion, garlic, thyme, basil and tomatoes is lingering in the air and this makes me happy.

I had blood work done over a couple of weeks ago, my results are less than satisfactory.  My TSH levels jumped another .09 since my last test.  This has effected my cholesterol levels in ways that I found unbelievable.  I was shocked!    There has been a direct correlation in the last two tests. What does this mean?…..my thyroid is having a shit fit.  I am burnt out, actually my adrenal glands are burnt and my pituitary has malfunctioned.  I have been feeling crappy for a good couple years, but I had chalked it up to Peri-menopause.   So a girl thinks – this too shall pass.  NOPE!

Here’s the deal – many women in my family take the pill.  Not that pill, the synthetic thyroid med every day and they still haven’t lost weight, still are stress mongers and don’t feel like themselves.  I refuse to join in the party.  So I made an appointment with the husband’s nutritionist to see if there is anything I could do in order to not take the pills.  Everything I have researched over this week points to refined wheat, rice, barley (I love barley) well…. gluten being one part of the issue.   On Monday we started a no gluten, no refined , no preservatives, no nothing in the the grub change in diet.  We already do the last part but moving away from gluten is going to be interesting.  BTW this also includes sugar – the white stuff.

I read this blog called “Gluten Free Girl”, long before I started this blog – Shauna’s recipe for grilled/broiled peaches is divine.  Her blog is personable and the food that she and her chef hubby make has always been intriguing to me.  I never thought that I would actually be  making a life style change and the gluten free community is where I would need to turn to because let’s face it – I love bread, pizza, cake and all the other sins of baking.  I have no shame, and yes I love stuff I am not suppose to have.  I am human and not some saint after all.

You see I only weigh 104 lbs but I do love the goodies.  This simply goes to show that weight has absolutely nothing to do with health or how you feel.  I have no energy, doing a 4-6 mile hike puts me in nappy time mode.  I have no motivation, I push myself everyday to do what I need to do.  Might by explained by the lack of energy.  I go through phases of depression for no apparent reason-loathing the city I live in may be part of that, but still.   The light headed feeling I can really do without.  These are just a few of the many.  It’s all rather complex.  However  I really need to do something with stress I like to pretend that I don’t have.  We all have stress it just comes in different forms, that’s all.

So I am taking a couple supplements – made from whole foods to re-balance my pituitary which will filter down to my adrenal which will stop robbing my thyroid.  I already drink greenie (sea and land veggie + algea) smoothies for breakfast with hemp powder for almost a year now and I could only just imagine what my TSH would have looked like had I not.  I am 7 days clean from eating gluten and sugar and eat a very limited amount of carbs.   My body is too taxed out right now to deal with having too many carbohydrates to deal with.   What I have already figured out very quickly is that I do not eat enough food throughout the day.   I have to figure out how how to deal with this and now I understand why I seek out junk food.  My workplace is full of it, everywhere I look there it is, gluten and sugar.

What I find which has been interesting is since yesterday after 3.5 mile hike – very easy, btw – we ate, we went shopping and I was exhausted.  I took a nap – not unusual for me – and when I woke up I felt light heated, dizzy, floaty – if you will, high without the stuff.  Today I feel a little better.   The dizzy spells, much less than yesterday, are making me a little crazy.  I figure the best way to calm the crazies is put a little jazz on and start cooking hoping tomorrow will be a better day.

Living for Sundays…..

I think this would sum it up…….

Ice Box Cave

It’s a pack walk

We are up between 6:00 am and 7:00 am every Sunday morning to take part in this get together of like minded folks.  We pick a park, this time it was “The Ledges” at Cuyahoga National Park, we meet up and hike between 2 -4 miles depending on  the weather.  We do this for our dogs, and for us.

For us living in an urban environment can take a toll on the psyche – specially me.  Hiking recharges the batteries, for me it is where I find peace and balance.  This Sunday was a perfect day.  I will be the first one to tell you that it is not easy living in a dying city.  For those who live in this environment and are feeling a little “off”, if possible, get away and go for hike.   There is something about Mother Nature’s healing powers of the spirit.